chrish's guide to drive-thru etiquette

[chrish]

1 -
Any more than 3 people in the car and you're not eligible for the drive through. Get off your lazy asses and walk in the place. A large SUV with a full family of 7 is definitely not eligible for the dt window. The only reason we tolerate your overprocreating asses is because we can switch to another line while you order enough burgers and fries to feed the entire Chinese army. The next time I see your asses in the dt, I'm gonna cull the herd a bit if you get my drift.

2 -
If you don't know what you want, then park the damn thing and walk your lazy fat ass into the restaurant. Don't sit there in front of me with your thumb up your ass as you try to decide. Get your shit together and preplan your order next time.

3 -
Have your money ready. You KNOW you have to pay. Digging for your purse or wallet is bullshit. The moron in the window holding your bag of starch and grease even knows it's bullshit.

3a-
When they hand you change, drop it in the change bin or ash tray quickly. Yes - you can give it a quick check to make sure Julio isn't trying to finance his cousin Juan's illegal entry into the country by stealing a nickel from every customer, but do it quickly. If you can't count change quickly, then practice at home, not when you're in front of me and my food is getting cold because you can't handle base ten.

3b-
ATM/Credit cards are unacceptable. The next time I see that damn thing with the curly cord being handed to you, I'm gonna plug it into the 220 outlet for the fryers. Account closed ass hole!

4-
Yes, you have the right to check your bag before driving off. Joe was right "They fuck you in the drive through...". However, that doesn't mean unwrapping every freaking burger and counting the sesame seeds. If you can't sort it out in about 4 seconds, get your ass out of line and pull over to the side. You're better off screaming in the restaurant anyway, because there are more fat lazy assholes like you the management doesn't want to hear you complaints - so they're likely to give you free stuff to shut you up and get rid of you.

5-
If you can't drive and eat at the same time, leave it for until you get home. I see your ass swerving into my lane while you're stuffing your face with gigacholestorol goodies, I'm gonna wipe that secret sauce off your kisser with my front bumper.

Thank you for your cooperation.

[battlebot]

Have your money ready. You KNOW you have to pay. Digging for your purse or wallet is bullshit.

That was a main cause of lines during Christmas at WalMart. People simply would be fumbling with their wallet, purse or Check..but they had plenty of time standing in line doing nothing other than ranting about lines...

debit is the way to go. pop the pin and you're done. you either have cash or you don't.

[chrish]

6 -
You may not change your order when you get to the pickup window. If you forgot something - tough shit. You get the order as is. If you want it bad enough, get back in line - don't make me wait and don't make the moron at the window figure out how to handle the change because you don't have your shit together.

[Haul Asp]

7 -
Don't stop to talk with the cashier or wait person. Nobody gives a shit about what you have to say anyway.

That about wraps it up. Have a nice day.